It is clear that our job now, is to yield to who we really are.  And who we are is revealed through a jumble of whims, longings and clear calls to action voiced not by our constructed personality but by our character, the structure from which everything moves. We find ourselves at last, on our good days, sinking back into a natural sense of self and resting there.  We are no longer running away from this place of acceptance of our core identity or resisting it in any way.  We simply rest there. From this position of authentic contact with our essential nature, we now begin to move.  We are not compelled to act by the requirements of the family or the job, we find ourselves instead moving like a bumble bee, as nature at this time of life intends for us, from flower to flower, pollinating with the perspective and wisdom of age and experience.

We push up and out of our old identities and reach toward a new and at the same time re-membered authentic self.  In our 3^rd act workshops and coaching, we encourage this pushing up and reaching out movement.  We do it by asking you to reflect deeply about what calls to you and what no longer calls or has relevance or interest.  This is the internal maneuver that helps to identify your essential nature.

It is in the 3^rd Act that we pull ourselves up and out of the old habits of “shoulds” and “oughts”. We are also pulled by others, ahead of us in their 3^rd Act, into the full flowering of our third growth.  It is a growth that demands a more complex response to reality.  We are asked in this new developmental stage to move slowly and reflect deeply on the true nature or character of our self.

We are asking of ourselves at this time in life to take action from a place of character.  We do this by listening deeply to our inner voice.  Sometimes this voice is very quiet and speaks to us in a whisper.  Sometimes the voice comes in the form a synchronicity or even as a kind of a nudging.  For instance, as I did recently, you may find yourself pulled up the street you are walking on to press your nose to the window of a gym full of interesting athletic equipment. Suddenly you are transported into a desire to feel the kind of natural strength and agility you had as a kid.  Pay attention to these nudges.  This is your authentic self speaking to you. How will you respond?

Our character, Hillman states, is not a compilation of “habits, virtues, vices,” It is a rich, complex and multifaceted self that becomes increasingly tolerant and expansive with an ability to complete the developmental challenge of interceding for the younger generations with wisdom and love and moreover to bless them in their endeavors to grow. When we truly take our place as elders with a force of character, we set a powerful example and allow the natural movement of generational energy to flow to those who follow.  This is our gift.

Last week, Patricia Ellsberg and her older sister Barbara Marx Hubbard talked at a gathering in Mill Valley Ca. about a shift towards feminine wisdom and the power of the change or shift we are embarking on at this time. I believe the words social movement and feminine wisdom are connected.

We, in the second half of our lives, have a great opportunity to move our planet in a direction of greater abundance of material resources, cooperation, and co- creation. We, as women and men tapping into our feminine wisdom and human concern must stand for global peace. We, as boomers, have the numbers and a 30-year bonus on our side. We, as the elders, have an opportunity to pass on what we know because more of us are living longer healthier and more vital lives than ever before on planet earth .

We may not be nimble and quick in solving new math problems or using new technology, but we do have the ability to synthesize and bring the wisdom of experience to some of our most erasable problems like poverty, hunger, peace, the abuse of women and children and global warming. We have an opportunity to give back and to make things much, much better before we take our leave. We can sit back and take or we can give back now. We can mentor younger generations. We can help new businesses get off the ground. We can volunteer to teach in schools. We can help in developing countries. We can start our own new small businesses. We can find a way to take less of this nation’s resources as David Brooks recommends.

Do you feel the call to step up and demand that our country improve health care, education, the environment, and international peace?

In our small way the 3rd act is part of this social movement. “What now?” Bev and I asked ourselves before we came together to do this work. Ask yourself “What now?” and then go further. “ How can I bring improvement on the planet for those in the next generation? “ We have the “Tea Party” and the “Coffee Party” movements. What shall we call ourselves? Let’s join together and begin.

We began to explore what others were thinking, through speaking with friends and colleagues that we knew personally, researching the popular media and the academic literature on the subject. Before long we had determined that there was a rapidly growing interest in reinventing “retirement” and so The 3rd Act workshop was conceived.

In developing the design we were each drawn to particular aspects of the subject.  For example Bev was especially interested in helping people discover their signature strengths (although that has since taken a lower profile), while I was attracted to helping them apply the relatively new science of positive psychology.  Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s book, “Finding Flow”, was an important trigger for me here.

Positive Psychology speaks to the importance of finding meaning, learning to live in the moment, and active engagement.  Although it was not introduced as a formal subject of study until the late 1990’s, by Martin Seligman, then President of the American Psychological Association, its findings resonate with what many of us know from experience. Back in the 1970s, before my organizational consulting and coaching career, I had been a career counselor, helping young people at the outset of their second acts make career choices. Helping them explore their values, examine what gives them meaning, and recognizing that they have transferable skills, was as important then as it is for people now in mid-life generations contemplate their third acts.

Once we had the design – initially a 2-day workshop – we previewed it with a series of introductory workshops to carry out the market research and marketing that any new venture requires.  We wanted to validate our assumption that the 3rd Act was a subject that people would be interested in enough to invest a weekend of their time and to get feedback on the topics we covered and the emphasis we gave to them. We also wanted to provide people with a taste of how we would work with them both as individuals and as a group to stimulate self-exploration and dialogue.  Greatly encouraged by what we learned from these introductory sessions, we went on to launch the first of what were to be several full 2-day workshops.

Our first participants were people that Bev or I knew directly. Over the next 2 years we realized we needed to develop a marketing strategy to reach out beyond our immediate circle of friends and colleagues.  With the feedback we received from the workshops we condensed them to one day.  In other words, our venture was a living example of the challenge that many of us will face in embarking on a new initiative in our third act. Even though Bev and I applied skills that were readily transferable from our respective second acts to a new initiative that held meaning and purpose or us, this wasn’t sufficient.  Research, planning and persistence to fully understand and reach out to our target audience were also necessary.

As I had to pull back from active involvement in The 3rd Act workshops, Bev moved forward with a new partner, Patricia Cavanaugh.  Together they launched a new independent website and a monthly newsletter which I must say I find quite impressive.  The news of The 3rd Act is spreading and gaining traction.  It’s been exciting to see it grow! I am proud of my role in conceiving, designing and launching The 3rd Act.  I hope to re-engage more actively in the future.

I doubt if my solution works for everyone.  What has worked for you?  What do you find helps you get motivated and take the steps down the road toward your big dreams?